Queen Moonshine

We regret to announce the death of Dave Bird.

Dave was almost three years old and died in his sleep of old age. He was predeceased by his brother Digby (image above), the famous ear nibbler.

Dave's funeral took place in a wheelie bin and was attended by Moo Bird who read a short prayer of her own creation.

During his long life, Dave pissed on many shoulders and nibbled several things it would have been better if he didn’t, including the still warm corpse of his brother. Never a slave to convention, Dave famously tried to escape captivity by chewing his way into a bag of compost and waiting for bin day. Although his plan failed he will be remembered among the rat community of Cordwallis Road and the Bird family as a great trailblazer who shat in his food bowl.

Advertisement