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    Monday, December 21st, 2009
    maxrael
         		5:01p
    10 years on

    It was ten years ago History Of Guns released our first CD, Little Miss Suicide EP. To celebrate it's available for free download from Last FM for a limited period, see here:

    http://www.last.fm/music/History+of+Guns/Little+Miss+Suicide+EP

    If you're not on Last FM, email me at historyofguns@hotmail.com and i'll mail it to you in a zip.

    Previous guns demos were all recorded and mixed at demo studios. This was the first thing I recorded and mixed at home on a PC. To be honest listening back to it now, bearing in mind I didn't have a clue what I was doing when I mixed it, I was expecting it to sound a lot worse than it does.

    As ever please feel free to re-post, tweet or otherwise share the link with the rest of the world.
    Sunday, December 20th, 2009
    maxrael
         		11:12a
    India
     Been back 10 days now and not had a chance to write up India trip. Fortunately Caden was pretty good on the flights and slept most of the time.
    India was amazing. First half we (me, wifeface, caden, parents in-law and sister in-law) were in southern Goa right at the start of the season so it was still pretty deserted and maybe a bit too hot in the middle of the day. (they were just starting their winter). Stayed in a lovely villa with a shared swimming pool and beach very close by. Most of the time had it all to ourselves!
    Goa as you'd expect is very tourist-friendly, most people speak English. It's predominantly Catholic (Portugese descent) so booze and alcohol abound. Sadly the Goa-Trance has all but been killed off by a change in the law banning outdoor parties (apart from a brief season when it's allowed around New Year, see the Sunburn festival for more info)
    2nd half of the holiday, complete culture shock as we got an internal flight to a small village in Gudjuarat where my wife's Dad is from for a big family wedding. Dirt tracks, cows wandering around, no air conditioning, patchy electricity... people getting up at 5am to light the fires heat the water. We had an outhouse with a gas-powered hot water tap which was newly installed. Never mind not speaking English most people had never seen a white person not on television. They stared and stared in an unashamedly curious way and little children dared each other to come and say things to me. It was very much communal living, doors are left open all the time and random people from the village wander into your house at any time. Oh and there's not really alcohol. Wifeface and sister in-law had roles to play in the wedding so were busy with preparations for 3 days... and then the wedding lasted for 3 days and then we were on our way home. With hindsight we should have had the relaxing Goa beach-part 2nd! I met excellent people but also had plenty of time to myself to think and read. Caden loved it. Made a lot of friends and spent most of the time playing in the mud.
    I've wanted to go to India since I was about 13 years old and was relieved it didn't let me down at all. I completely loved it. Hope to go back next time for a few months, hopefully within the next few years if I can manage it.
    Saturday, December 19th, 2009
    deathboy
         		8:03p
    Android
     Just picked up an Android G2, what's the essential software for such a toy?*

    * "bluh bluh bluh, I have a tiny dick, your phone is shit haw haw haw" fuckwits need not bother answering, cheers.
    deathboy
         		8:29a
    mawkish, moi?
     Am currently in a lovely little island of calm between on-going house-moving logistics (all papers filed, waiting for references to come back, thinking about which days will have be be curtailed from my family visit to make the move once I get the keys) and keeping to the deadlines I have racked up for the "holiday" (which is increasingly becoming a misnomer).

    I mean, yes, I'm awake before 8am on a saturday, having had about 4 hours sleep, but importantly, I went to sleep in and woke up to a bedroom containing my wife and my son.

    I am big ape in his techno-cave, with his family.

    Sleeping sounds and blinking LEDs and plasma screen with illustrated, anthropomorphic, singing animals entertaining the little one.

    This makes big ape happy.

    Plus, big ape should be getting a shiny new gadget-phone and a pocket-sized HDMI divx player delivered between now and lunchtime. Which also makes big ape quite pleased.

    Nothing like fulfilling Maslow's hierarchy of needs from both directions at the same time :)

    Later today, a last bit of Christmas shopping, a little work, and another evening with Corben visiting.

    I'm cautious not to jinx things - my metaphorical knackers are still sore from the collective kickings delivered over the last week - but a bit of determination and the reassurance of having my wonderful wife and extended social circle there for some back-up is going a long way.

    If i can get away with a nap or two without Corben playing the bongos on my head, I shall consider the weekend quite successfully begun.
    Thursday, December 17th, 2009
    deathboy
         		8:22a
    the rabbit
     THE RABBIT HAS ENTERED THE WARREN!

    REPEAT THE RABBIT HAS ENTERED THE WARREN!

    OPEN CHARLIE TUNNEL WE DIG TILL DAWN!

    (kirsten got in fine, we actually got exactly the luck I'd prayed for, no heavy questioning, booyah!)

    :D
    deathboy
         		6:35a
    vibes
     Hokayyyy motherfuckers!

    Today shall be potentially challenging.

    Picking Kirsten up from Heathrow soon, for the Christmas hols... we've been warned that we could face even more of a barrage of questions than normal because she now is clearly married to me (my surname and everything, something we could have avoided, doh!) then they will want even more robust proof that she won't overstay her welcome.

    Of course, it might just be the standard "show your return ticket, answer a few questions about your stay" affair, in which case I shall be able to scoop her up in an hour! We don't quite get a month this time, about three-and-a-bit weeks, but I've been just about going out of my mind missing her, so fingers crossed immigration smile upon our array of "look seriously, she's in the last six months of a 5 year degree, she ain't staying here" evidence :P I shall report back!

    Annnnd next, I shall be finishing my forms and handing them in to the estate agents later today. I don't THINK I need luck with these as my references normally check out, but given the potential level of bureaucracy and ineptitude that is seemingly endemic throughout Britain's property "professionals", I would be glad of a prevailing wind at my back so we could start moving in next week. We shall seeeeee.

    Cross your internal organs for me, folks. Good vibes, vibraphones, vibrators and copies of Vib Ribbon all graciously accepted!

    I'm off to lasso me a wife!
    Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
    deathboy
         		2:44p
    Ouch. Just added up what this move IS costing me, and effectively, it's going to eat my entire christmas bonus.

    Fuck it. 's only money.
    deathboy
         		2:39p
    Ah fuckedy HAHA!

    Found a room. Same (CHEAP) money I'm paying now, 10 minutes walk from where I live now, available immediately.

    In fact, the only down side is that it's 3rd floor. I guess that's going to get me and Corben fit, but it's not the end of the universe.

    I've put down a deposit, and will get them the documents tomorrow, I could very possibly be ready to move in before Christmas, or immediately in the new year.

    Which means that I'll get the shitty moving part out of the way before the current dayjob project goes thermonuclear.

    Of course, I'm dropping money on things like a (bullshit) admin fee and finding a new deposit, etc, but everywhere you live is a compromise, so fuck it.

    Fingers crossed my references go through quickly and trouble-free.

    Fucking GET IN.
    annajaneclare
         		4:22a
    Tuesday, December 15th, 2009
    deathboy
         		11:18p
    improvement
     am feeling better than earlier.

    been talking to friends and kirsten, my folks and corben's mom about how things might work out and at least I seem to have a number of escape plans.

    in the short term, there's a few properties slap bang in the middle of enfield that I'm going to try to look at *tomorrow* that suit perfectly. If I could absolutely sprint through the process, I could move before christmas and know that I'm coming back after seeing my folks, to my own place. Not hugely likely, but not impossible.

    and kirsten will be helping me look, and my folks will make with the chequebook if needs be (finding a new deposit after christmas? just what I needed! ouch...)

    So, yis. Things will fix. I may need some help though. cheers for all the kind words, already, it does perk me up :)
    deathboy
         		6:15p
    kick in the face
     Whelp, today has been something of a loss.

    I fucked up and Kirsten's actually coming thursday, not tomorrow. Mostly fixed by re-arranging hotel and asking lovely people if they could help me out on a different day.

    Then I got told that for us to hit our deadlines, I have to work throughout christmas.

    This is during the time i get to see kirsten, and while I will be looking after my son and travelling to and from my parents' in the midlands.

    I'd just about taken that on the chin, when my housemate asks if he can talk for five minutes, to tell me that he's kicking me out.

    In February. The start of February. This is during the time that our project will be finishing.

    And yes, he can do that, as we have no contracts here, because it's run as a sort of rolling house-share for Polish folks who may not stay long, or may leave abruptly.

    I figured there was a strange mood in the house, so I assume that everyone already knew, as it does get a bit us-and-them on the language and gossip front occasionally.

    I was told that it's because his sister is moving over and he needs the room for her to give her a start, but I don't know if that's true. My guess is that they finally got sick of me.

    So today has been quite extraordinarily bad.

    For the first time in my adult life, I'm considering taking my parents up on their offer of going home to live with them, because I feel as though I can't stand on my own two feet any more.

    It was already too much, I was already losing control, and this is now, categorically more than I can deal with.

    I'm not sure how I'm going to handle this.

    Second fucking christmas on the run, as well... people really want to STOP picking this time of year to make people homeless.

    Jesus. I don't even feel suicidal. I just feel... numb.

    I will turn this around. I don't currently know how.
    deathboy
         		2:24p
    crap crap crap crappedy fuckballs
     You know when you're fucking furious about something, and want to be mad at the world, except that in actual fact, it's your own fault?

    Kirsten is not arriving tomorrow.

    She's FLYING tomorrow.

    I booked a hotel and asked a friend to take corben on the wrong day, and i don't get to see her tomorrow.

    It's like having christmas put back a day.

    FUCKING PISS.

    i'm an idiot, i should have remembered it was an overnight flight.

    i have been more happy.
    Monday, December 14th, 2009
    jaketherat
         		5:08p
    Remember my rant about Create bikes?*

    Looks like they're doing some firefighting.



    *You probably don't†, but couldn't you just humour me?
    †You've probably all died and gone to Facebook
    deathboy
         		12:57p
    M-Audio seem to have a new DJ controller out.

    I finally don't need any more DJ control surfaces since I got my beloved Pacemaker, but this looks alright. I had the original X-session, and it was (and still is) a good piece of kit.

    Speaking of which, fucking ThinkGeek and Firebox are stocking the Pacemaker... crikey, it's gone all mainstream...
    deathboy
         		12:47p
    The BBC's Have Your Say comments board is normally full of utter fuckwits, but occasionally it's refreshing to see the great unwashed seemingly holiding a similar opinion* as me:

    Does religion have a part to play in politics? (the most popular answers being a resounding "no")`

    - spawned from the Archbishop of Canterbury basically whinging that people are less bothered about religion these days. Whelp, that's pretty much the state of play, matey. Doesn't matter what you say or what circles you move in, the country is not dominated by people to whom religion is particularly significant.

    Obviously, the guy's just doing his job and genuinely believes the world is thus - I don't have the hate for him, though I do think he's strapped on the rose-tinted glasses on this one.

    * and thus correct, obviously, for I know all
    deathboy
         		12:36p
    Waldorf Edition Plug-In Suite

    If you're one of those crazy fuckers who pays for their software, this isn't bad value for money.

    The D-Pole filter is a total classic and worth £25 on its own, getting the attack and the wave table synth (both good, but many similar good products exist) is just a bonus. the D-Pole is a fucking insane filter plugin... lots of modes, really strong, with built in distortion. Can take things from boring to FUCKING JESUS in about three clicks.

    I don't usually push paying for soft-synths as while their developers must work as hard as anyone else, I generally find the prices to be outrageous, but this isn't a bad bundle. Maybe a stocking-filler for the computer-musician in your life.
    Sunday, December 13th, 2009
    deathboy
         		6:30p


    Italy's PM Silvio Berlusconi is bloodied by attack

    FUCKING YES!

    Aw, man, that's made my fucking day!

    that's a happy picture right there. :D:D:D

    is there some way to shake a motherfucker's hand via the internet?

    on the down side, chances of the assailant meeting a sticky end soon: high.

    but fuck me, I want that picture framed.


    [edit:] to be clear, I'm not in favour of assaulting people, I'm getting some schadenfreude from seeing something bad happen to a total prick. If he'd took a pie in the face, or just fell over and broke his leg, I'd be just as happy. The man deserves some karma.
    deathboy
         		4:50p
    just realised, it's going to be really embarrassing if i actually don't like avatar when i see it ;)

    nattering about it with a mate, we came to the idea that there's a lot of pre-emptive dissing going on because secretly a lot of folks are excited to see it and don't want to be disappointed by it.

    reviews seem good though!
    deathboy
         		12:06p
    AVATAr IS A BIG PILE OF SHEIT
     YEAH, AVATARS FUCKING SHIT MAN

    FUCKINJG SHIT!!!! WHAT A WANKER I CAN T BELIEVE IT LOL

    what, have i seen it?

    no, of course not. i just can't believe how offensively shit it's going to be when i do go and see it.

    will I be supporting this multi-million-dollar hollywood production?

    oh yes. despite frothing at the chops about how shit it is BEFORE i see it, i will most definitely be paying at the cinema to watch it.

    am I being a bit of a tool about this?

    well, maybe a teensy bit.

    do I slag off harry potter? or twilight? well, no. what would be the point? they're well established as being populist awful films.

    how could I possibly increase my cachet, my social self-righteousness and fringe-cool by railing against such hackneyed victims?

    No, i must slag off this movie by a pretty well-respected producer, that's getting decent reviews well before I inevitably and confusingly pay to watch it at the cinema nonetheless.

    You're right. This behaviour is a bit confusing. I'm glad we had this chat.
    Friday, December 11th, 2009
    maxrael
         		4:44p
    love for outcast redheads
     Apparently today is hug a ginger day. if anyone wants a go?

    Sadly we've had to cancel going to Soulwaxmas tonight as Caden's just not getting the concept of jetlag, which means when he wakes in the middle of the night wanting to get up and play it's very hard to persuade him that he and everyone else should still be sleeping! but have fun if you who's going.

    Talking of cancellations, we've been let down by the babysitter for Depeche Mode next Tuesday at the o2 which means only one of us will be able to go… meaning we have a spare ticket, and Tom has a spare ticket also, so if you or anyone you know might be interested then please shout.

    This site should answer all your ginger questions, http://www.gingerhair.org.uk/

    I've given up saying but I'm strawberry blond, it only used to make the other kids laugh and hit me harder anyway! :)

    As the site says, "Redheads vary in shades from pale strawberry blondes to the darkest shade of red, ruby-tinted auburns."

    Though it also contains this great paragraph: "The Greeks on the other hand believed that red hairs or ginger haired individuals believed that people with ginger hair will turn to a vampire after death. Even Aristotle, one of the famous Greeks would have a negative comment about red heads. He would describe them as un-housebroken; whatever he meant by that, it surely sounds negative."

    and

    and "In UK, the word “ginga” is used to describe red haired individuals. They even came up with the term “gingerphobia” which means fear of red heads. Another term is “gingerism” meaning prejudice against red hair. They believed that red or gingered hair children are a byproduct of unclean sex. What do we mean by unclean sex? It’s when you made loved with your partner during your menstrual period."


    hope everyone's ok… feels like i haven't seen some of you for far too long.

    xx
    Thursday, December 10th, 2009
    maxrael
         		3:34p
    tickets for sale
     Anyone interested in two tickets for Soulwaxmas at Brixon Academy tomorrow night. Face value 22.50 each. Line-up includes Soulwax, 2ManyDJs and a host of guests...
    deathboy
         		3:09p
    UNEXPECTED MASSIVE WIN
     SO.

    I wake up.

    With a fucking hangover.

    And little sleep.

    And the one thing above all other things i have to do today is to get my passport application sent in, because Kirsten's coming over in a week and if they turn her back, i need to be able to travel to be with her. i am, under no circumstances, prepared to spend christmas apart from my wife.

    And I can't find the forms.

    Un-be-fucking-lievable.

    I am going out of my absolute fucking MIND trying to find this envelope.

    I go through the fucking bins.

    I check and re-check the whole fucking room, again and again.

    Nothing.

    This is INSANE.

    So, I start tearing the room apart.

    I find a pile of xbox and wii games. Shit, I never even played Soul Caliber on the Wii? Gutted!

    Shit, there's about three games still in their wrappers, I've been remiss! There's house of the dead, I'm sure I played that, maybe I bought a copy for someone else, then there's bioshock and oblivion on xbox budget range, but i'll get to them later, then there's my old passport, then there's that dragonball game on Wii and

    WAIT A FUCKING SECOND

    MY OLD FUCKING PASSPORT.

    UNDER A PILE OF XBOX GAMES.

    I HAVE FOUND MY MOTHERFUCKING PASSPORT.

    THIS IS EPIC.

    I am SO fucking relieved, plus about £120 better off (for the 1-week passport replacement service).

    I'm afraid that I did waste [info]ephemera's lunchtime yesterday, but it was a great excuse for pizza and a catch-up :)

    My room now looks like, well, like I hit it, I suppose. A bombsite that's been hit by another, larger bombsite.

    But I am content.

    i'm going to have a bath now. just you fucking wait and see.

    Hells bastarding yes, my friend. Hells yes INDEED.
    deathboy
         		1:40p
    Henceforth, all suicide notes should end with "lol".

    I can't take it any more. All of my life, I have struggled to make a difference, to be met at every turn by hateful, self-serving, vindictive fucks. Well, you drove me to this, and I hope that it weighs on your hearts as you go through life knowing that you forced me to cut mine short. My blood will forever be on your hands. lol.

    That's how I'm going out.
    deathboy
         		12:46p
    Hello, I'm Chris Rock and I'm painfully unfunny.

    If you have a multi-million dollar CGI production in which the entire cast (be they trucks, animals, or magnetic space badgers) is clearly and painfully white, you can hire me.

    I'll just talk like Chris Rock, which will be annoying, but then eventually, I'll stop, and the relief will be exquisite, and you'll get to think you have some level of diversity in your production. Which you don't.

    Mush dash, I have to say something "edgy".
    deathboy
         		12:31p
    I really hate the fact that most people on myspace use it as a spam gateway.

    We never post on other people's profiles, we never send junkmails.

    If you come onto my page and try to post a fucking three paragraph marketing screed, you're a rude fucking cunt, and you're going to be abused on your own profile, flagged as spam, then blocked, you worthless shit-bags.

    Also, i'm fucking your dad.
    [ << Previous 25 ]
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